Tips On Dating When Online Is Not For You

by Maureen Staiano

There are a lot of sites and articles relating to online dating. The pros and cons, the great love matches and the dating horror stories. I know quite a few people who have pursued this avenue when looking for Mr. or Ms. Right. How about some tips on dating if online doesn't work for you?

Some of the people I talked to have had average success and are still pursuing the "perfect partner" online give or take a few flaws. Others I know have tried it and felt it was not quite for them and moved onto other avenues of meeting someone. Many of my friends found that despite all the tips on dating available online, the people they eventually met had not been totally honest in their representations.

Meeting someone that you want to form a relationship with can be difficult. People move around quite often for work and getting connected in a new area can seem quite daunting. When you are heading toward middle age and maybe find yourself single after a divorce you can feel confused as to where to start. It can seem like a whole new world out there in today's dating scene.

After a certain age the bar scene doesn't quite cut it and if you are not a drinker it certainly isn't a great choice. It's tough to try and get to know someone in a noisy crowded atmosphere. Perhaps your old group of friends has scattered or worse yet, you are currently the only single person in your crowd.

You are looking for a special someone but feel that the online dating services are just not for you, where do you go?

The following are some of the successful tips on dating I have received from friends who have faced the same situation and were successful at meeting new friends and possible romantic partners.

1. Get involved in something in your community. Volunteer. Volunteering brings many people together for a unified purpose. It could be a community project or sometimes there are places such as the humane society (if you are an animal lover). If you happen to be a parent, the school is always looking for volunteers. Just check your local paper. It is a great resource for finding what's going on in your town and where they could use some help.

2. Join a club. Again the local paper will list different clubs, some designed expressly for singles. Find something that interests you and jump right in. If you change your mind later and feel it isn't right for you, move on to something else. At least this way you are in the process.

3. There are often some adult recreational sports that are fun and you get your exercise as well. This particular one worked for me. I had joined an adult recreational volleyball league after my divorce and met the man who eventually became my second husband.

4. I have a few friends who have taken evening classes at the local college or through adult education and met people they were interested in. It's always easier to strike up a conversation when you know that you and the other person already share a common interest.

5. Don't be afraid of having your friends set you up on a blind date. Hopefully they at least know a little about your likes and dislikes and will keep that in mind as they make a recommendation. Either way try to keep an open mind and just treat as good practice for the next person that comes into your life.

These are just a few tips on dating to consider if you find yourself a little ill at ease with online dating. Without a doubt, dating online has worked for many people but it may not be the best answer for everyone.

About the Author

Maureen Staiano is a Life Coach specializing in working with women and the unique challenges, opportunities and transitions we face in our lives. Please visit me:

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